I was putting my words out into the world for the first time, and it scared the life out of me. But it was the start of trusting what I had to say – that it was valid and useful and helpful and needed to be heard.

In one of those first blogs I quoted Mark Twain: “In 20 years from now. You’ll be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbour. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Well, it’s been 11 years since I wrote that post and I’m not disappointed with what I’ve done. I haven’t achieved what I’ve wanted in the time frame I thought I would. But I am a very different person to the one who wrote that first blog – and yet the essentials remain the same.

What I’ve discovered as I’ve thrown off the bowlines – the things that tether me to the shore of what’s been true in the past, how I’ve always done things, what others expect – is me. The deep true essence of who I am that has been hidden behind and beneath so much ‘stuff’.

A friend who had done his own work of casting off the bowlines commented on one of my early posts: “I wonder whether we trust ourselves enough for the journey into our destiny. We seem addicted to finding fixed points of reference all the time.” There is much truth in this.

To throw off the bowlines, to explore, dream and discover, we must trust ourselves. This trust may only be small, but even a little bit of trust in ourselves is all that is needed to loosen the ties that bind us to the past, to the things that keep us small, and silent, and submissive.

Truth is, we’re big and bold and brassy. And we’ve only been small and silent and submissive because others felt threatened by us, were challenged by who we are. We’ve been told that being big is ‘unladylike’, that being bold is ‘unbecoming’, that being brassy is ‘unattractive.’ 

But as we throw off the bowlines we know that big, bold and brassy is actually beautiful – not in some supermodel kind of way but in a deep knowing of who we are and an unwillingness to be less than our true selves.



I’m no longer terrified of putting my words out there.

I give them wings and let them fly!